Practical Advice, Spiritual Reflections



Nowadays, it’s common to see child stars whose careers have gone on a dip, come back as men’s magazine cover girls, scantily clad in bikinis or sexy lingerie. The move, they’d usually say, is meant to communicate that they’re grown up and ready to take on more mature roles. How many times have I actually heard that? Sure, some of them have infiltrated local show business again but is that really what you’re willing to trade? Flesh for popularity? The respect of men for fame?

In the modern era, a lot of girls grow up thinking that in order to be accepted, they have to be sexy. And it’s not just the “sexy” that a lot usually equate with girl power, it’s the kind of “sexy” that means they have to show a little more cleavage, get enhancements or act all rowdy and wild, just so people would think of them as cool. If you watch television, more and more shows are openly including sexual acts into the plot. They may not be so visible, but how the scenario plays out immediately gives the viewer the idea that the characters on screen will sleep together or just slept together. It’s alarming how these shows are on primetime, meaning without parental discretion, kids who are still up can actually see these shows on TV. What kind of ideas would they get?

I remember seeing a show in one of the top networks. It was between 8pm and 9pm. The plot goes like this: the girl loves a guy, but because the guy did not pursue her, she moved on and ended up with a much older guy with whom she started to live with. The girl sees her old flame and realized that she still loved him. Her old flame, now an educated and bolder version of himself, decided to really pursue her. At first, she resisted him. A couple of episodes later, she showed up at her old flame’s place and sleeps with him, while still in a relationship with her live-in partner.

Oh, and the love scene played out on screen in a series of cut to cut sequences. Of course, the network couldn’t really show the graphic details but you get the picture. How that passed the eyes of the screening board is beyond me. And it isn’t just that show. Like I said, there are a lot on TV that incorporate scenes like that.

Going back to my first argument, it’s true that a lot of girls grow up having a wrong idea of self-worth and womanhood. You want guys to like you more? Show off more skin. Be proud of your cleavage. Make your butt bigger. Drink with them. Show them how wild you are.
If you study it closely, these factors of acceptance are mostly based on physical attributes and giving in to the dictates of the world. Can you not be a woman or a purveyor of “girl power” with your clothes on?

Girl power isn’t about showing off your goods and saying that you’re proud of them. Taking your clothes off do not immediately mean you’re more mature. What does that make of the other actresses who don’t choose that route? Not ready for more challenging, mature roles? When you say MATURE ROLES, does that equate to love scenes and taking your clothes off? When I hear MATURE ROLES, I think of mothers, successful business women, teachers, wise aunts, single women who are in charge of their careers, supportive wives, leaders, doctors, lawyers, authors, professors, writers, media practitioners, I could go on and on.

How can you not expect men to think of you as easy when photos showing your body off, circulate on the internet? How can you expect to receive the same amount of respect they’d give to Kate Middleton, let’s say? What irks me about some is that they complain that guys think of them as objects or that they get indecent proposals!

I’d like to end with this quote from Cathie Black, President of Hearst Magazines: “If you’re an employer and you have a choice of 10 applicants or 110, you’re going to choose the one who keeps her shirt on. End of story.”

First impressions leave a lasting impact. How you present yourself to people is going to affect how they perceive you even if you don’t open your mouth. 🙂


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